Breaking up with a narcissist can be difficult, especially when they initiate ‘no contact.’ The experience can be emotionally, mentally, and physically exhausting. However, no contact could also be the ultimate breakup strategy that you can use to recover and rediscover yourself.
If you are facing a situation where a narcissist has initiated no contact, this article is for you. We will explore different ways you can use the ‘no contact’ strategy to your advantage.
The Concept of ‘No Contact’
The concept of ‘no contact’ involves a complete cessation of all communication with a narcissist, including phone calls, text messages, emails, and even social media platforms. It is one of the most effective ways of breaking free from the manipulation, gaslighting, and emotional abuse that narcissists inflict on their victims.
The ‘no contact’ rule is not only beneficial to victims but also to narcissists. It denies them access to their preferred targets and forces them to look for new sources of narcissistic supply.
The Benefits of Going No Contact with a Narcissist
Healing
Going ‘no contact’ with a narcissist is an essential step towards healing. It helps to clear your head, balance your emotions, and allows you to experience peace and tranquility that you may have not experienced for a long time.
Regaining Control
Breaking free from the emotional bonds that bind victims of narcissistic abuse is vital in regaining control over their lives. While under the influence of a narcissist, victims may lose their sense of identity, become isolated from friends and family, and even experience financial ruin. Going ‘no contact’ helps to regain control over these aspects of life.
Increased Self-Esteem
The constant criticism, gaslighting, and emotional manipulation from a narcissist can wreak havoc on an individual’s self-esteem. Going ‘no contact’ helps to rebuild self-esteem, especially when used alongside therapy and support groups.
The Dos and Don’ts of Going No Contact with a Narcissist
The Dos
- Block their phone numbers, social media accounts, and email addresses
- Inform close friends and family members not to share any information about you with the narcissist
- Engage in self-care activities, such as exercising, meditating, or going on holiday
- Seek therapy and support groups
- Take time to rediscover and reconnect with yourself
The Don’ts
- Do not respond to any attempts at contact from the narcissist
- Do not engage in negative self-talk or self-blame
- Do not try to reason with a narcissist or seek closure from them
- Do not stalk or harass the narcissist
The Challenge of Going No Contact with a Narcissist
The idea of going ‘no contact’ with a narcissist can be daunting, and many people find that they struggle with it. They may be tempted to unblock the narcissist, respond to their messages, or even meet up with them. Some of the challenges associated with going ‘no contact’ include:
- Loneliness and isolation
- Feelings of guilt or shame
- Fear of the unknown
- Relapse into old habits
- Persistent thoughts about the narcissist
How to Overcome the Challenges of Going No Contact with a Narcissist
Build a Support System
Building a support system is crucial for anyone who wishes to go ‘no contact’ with a narcissist. Seek out a therapist or support group that specializes in dealing with narcissistic abuse or join an online community. It is also important to let your family and friends know about your decision to go ‘no contact’ and ask for their support.
Engage in Self-Care Activities
Going ‘no contact’ with a narcissist can be emotionally draining, and engaging in self-care activities can help you get through it. Some activities that could help include meditation, yoga, exercising, and journaling.
Set Boundaries
Setting boundaries is an essential aspect of going ‘no contact.’ Be clear about what you expect from the narcissist and let them know in no uncertain terms. It is essential to stick to the boundaries you set for your own well-being.
Take Responsibility for Your Own Recovery
Your journey to recovery is yours alone, and only you can take responsibility for it. It is crucial to avoid comparing yourself to others or blaming yourself for not being able to move on quickly enough. Take your time and trust the process.
The Final Word
Going ‘no contact’ with a narcissist may not be easy, but it is a necessary step towards healing from the emotional, mental, and physical abuse suffered under a narcissist’s hands. Remember, the journey to recovery is unique to each individual, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. Seek support, engage in self-care activities, set boundaries, and take responsibility for your own recovery.
FAQs
- Q: Is ‘no contact’ really necessary for healing from narcissistic abuse?
- A: Yes, it is. ‘No contact’ is essential for re-establishing control over your life, rebuilding self-esteem, and promoting healing.
- Q: How long does it take to recover from narcissistic abuse?
- A: Recovery is a process that varies from person to person. Some people may take months, while others may take years. It is crucial to avoid comparing yourself to others and trust the process.
- Q: Should I seek revenge on the narcissist who abused me?
- A: No, seeking revenge will only prolong your healing process and give the narcissist more power over you. It is best to focus on your own recovery and leave the narcissist in your past.
References
- Psychology Today. (2018). The Narcissist’s One Trick That They Can’t Live Without. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/toxic-relationships/201801/the-narcissists-one-trick-they-cant-live-without
- McBride, K. (2016). Will the Narcissist Come Back to Me? Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-legacy-distorted-love/201608/will-the-narcissist-come-back-me
- Tresierra, R. (2019). 5 Things to Expect When Going ‘No Contact’ with a Narcissist. Retrieved from https://www.wellandgood.com/no-contact-narcissist/