Is Your Relationship at Risk? How to Tell If You’re Being Cheated On

Infidelity is one of the most devastating experiences a person can go through in a relationship. It’s a heart-wrenching experience that can leave you feeling betrayed, hurt, and questioning your self-worth. Unfortunately, cheating in relationships is not uncommon. According to one study, about 22% of married men and 14% of married women admitted to having cheated on their spouse at least once during their marriage. So, how can you tell if your partner is cheating on you? In this article, we’ll explore some signs that indicate your relationship may be at risk and what you can do about it.

Signs That Your Partner Is Cheating on You

While cheating can manifest in different ways, there are certain warning signs that may indicate your partner is being unfaithful. Here are some of the most common signs:

1. Your Gut Feeling Tells You So

The human instinct is a powerful tool. Your gut feeling is usually right, and if you have a nagging feeling that something isn’t right, you should trust it. If you feel that your partner is lying or withholding information, it’s probably because they are.

2. Your Partner is More Distant

If your partner is becoming more distant, it’s a red flag that something is up. They may deny or downplay the changes in their behavior, but if you notice a significant shift in your partner’s feelings towards you, it may be time to question the reason behind it.

3. Your Partner Is Suddenly Overly Protective of Their Phone

Does your partner get annoyed or defensive when you pick up their phone or try to look at their messages? If so, it could be a sign that they are trying to hide something. It’s essential to be aware of these changes in your partner’s behavior.

4. Unusual Financial Transactions

Infidelity is often expensive. If you notice an increase in cash withdrawals, unusual purchases, or unexplained credit card charges, it could be a sign that your partner is trying to hide something financially, which may be linked to infidelity.

5. Your Partner is Hanging Out With A New Group of Friends

If your partner has suddenly started hanging out with a new group of friends that you don’t know, or they’re spending more time with someone you don’t trust, it’s worth investigating. Your partner may be trying to hide the extent of their relationship with this person.

6. Intimacy Changes

Changes in intimacy levels can indicate infidelity. Your partner may become more distant or withdraw and exhibit a sudden lack of interest in sexual activities. Your partner may also become more sexually demanding, which could be a sign of guilt or an attempt to cover up infidelity.

What to do if You Suspect Your Partner is Cheating on You?

If you suspect that your partner is being unfaithful, it’s essential to confront them. Here are some tips on how to go about it:

1. Approach Them Gently

It’s important to approach your partner with care and tact. Accusing them outright or with hostility is not a healthy way to launch a conversation.

2. Ask Specific Questions

When having a cheating discussion, it’s essential to ask specific questions that your partner can answer. It will help ensure that everyone is heard, and the conversation remains focused. This avoids veering off-topic and becoming intense or emotional during the conversation.

3. Set Boundaries and Expectations

If you’re planning on working things out, it’s helpful to set boundaries early on. And if you’re still feeling emotional or reactive, it’s important to communicate those feelings in a thoughtful and productive manner. Agreeing on what you’re striving for within your relationship and the necessary steps to get there is vital for disclosure.

How to Deal with Infidelity in Your Relationship?

Discovering that your partner is cheating on you is a difficult and painful experience. If you have decided to work things out with your partner, here are some tips that may help you overcome these challenges and come out stronger on the other side:

1. Seek Mental Health Support

Mental health support will make a big difference in your recovery process. A qualified professional can help you deal with your feelings and build a plan to move forward.

2. Practice Better Communication

Learning how to communicate better with your partner can significantly improve your chances of overcoming infidelity. Working together to identify the root cause of infidelity and building better communication going forward typically leads to a stronger and healthier relationship.

3. See A Relationship Counselor

Seeing a relationship counselor is about guidance and support to help you and your partner work through any issues that may have caused the infidelity. A counselor can assist you in coping with the emotional trauma of infidelity and help you both develop the skills needed to strengthen the relationship.

Tips to Build a Strong and Healthy Relationship

Once you’ve made the decision to work things out with your partner, it’s essential to start rebuilding trust in your relationship again. Here are some tips that may help you build a stronger and healthier relationship:

1. Listen to Your Partner

One of the most important aspects of a healthy and committed relationship is good communication, and that starts with active listening. Make sure that each partner has an opportunity to express their needs, desires and hopes for the relationship, and make sure that you hear and understand what they are telling you.

2. Be Honest with Your Partner

Honesty is always the best policy in a relationship. You should be truthful with your partner about your feelings and the reasons why you may have cheated in the first place.

3. Don’t Hold on to Grudges

It’s crucial that you don’t hold on to negative thoughts or engage in any grudges that may arise from the cheating. Holding grudges creates an unhealthy dynamic and can lead to further relationship distress.

4. Always Respect Your Partner

A committed, healthy relationship is founded on mutual respect. Ensure that you respect your partner’s thoughts, feelings, and actions and work cohesively to build the relationship going forward.

FAQs on Cheating and Infidelity in Relationships

  • Q: How do I know if my partner is cheating on me?
  • A: Look out for warning signs, such as your gut feeling, new patterns of behavior, changes in sex life, and reluctance to admit or share information with you.

  • Q: Should I confront my partner if I think they are cheating on me?
  • A: Yes, it is essential to discuss the situation with your partner to work on resolving the problem together.

  • Q: Can a relationship recover from cheating?
  • A: Yes, a relationship can recover from infidelity by working together on communication, building trust and seeking professional help.

  • Q: Is it possible to prevent infidelity in a relationship?
  • A: It’s not possible always to prevent infidelity, but a healthy and open-minded communication style, honesty and trust can help prevent infidelity.


If you’re feeling like your relationship is at risk and you suspect infidelity, you must take action. Seeking support from a professional, speaking with your partner in a productive, honest and calm way and working collaboratively can help you explore where you go from here.


  • Norris, A. L., Baker, R., & Pearce, T. (2020). The incidence and prevalence of infidelity, sexual, and emotional relationships. Journal of Sex Research, 1-13.
  • Rathus, S. A., Nevid, J. S., & Fichner-Rathus, L. (2019). Human sexuality in a world of diversity. Pearson.
  • Mark, K. P., Janssen, E., & Milhausen, R. R. (2011). Infidelity in heterosexual couples: demographic, interpersonal, and personality-related predictors of extradyadic sex. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 40(5), 971-982.
  • Vaughn, J. C. (2019). Repairing relational ruptures caused by infidelity: An emotion-focused therapy (EFT) perspective. Journal of Family Psychotherapy, 30(2), 110-119.

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