Narcissists are known to be self-centered individuals who seek personal validation and admiration from other people. They often have an inflated sense of self-importance and an intense need for attention and admiration, making it difficult for them to handle rejection or failure. This often leads to destructive thoughts and behaviors, especially when they feel like they’ve been replaced or abandoned. So, how do narcissists feel when you move on?
The Initial Reaction
When a narcissist learns that you’ve moved on, the initial reaction may vary. Some may react with rage, while others may deny that they care. However, regardless of the reaction, the underlying feeling is usually one of intense pain and hurt. You see, narcissists often derive their self-worth from external validation, so when they feel rejected or replaced, they experience a blow to their ego.
What Happens Next?
After the initial reaction, a narcissist may enter what’s called “survival mode.” This is where they’ll try to find ways to regain control or power over the situation. This could mean attempting to win you back, spreading rumors about you, or even trying to sabotage your new relationship.
The Blame Game
Narcissists are not known for taking responsibility for their actions, and this is no different when it comes to a breakup. They may blame you for the relationship ending, even going so far as to make you believe that you were the problem. This is a manipulation tactic designed to protect their fragile ego.
The Loneliness Sets In
After a breakup, it’s natural to feel lonely. However, for a narcissist, this loneliness can be unbearable. They may feel like they’re losing a part of themselves, as if they can’t function without you. This can lead to feelings of desperation and depression.
The Healing Begins
Just as with anyone else, time heals all wounds. However, narcissists may require more time and effort to heal from a breakup. Because they often have a skewed sense of reality and self-worth, it can take a long time for them to come to terms with the end of the relationship.
Reconnecting with Themselves
As a result of the breakup, a narcissist may start to reconnect with themselves. They may begin to question their behavior and try to understand what went wrong. This can be a positive step towards personal growth and self-improvement.
Seeking Validation Elsewhere
Narcissists are known to seek validation and attention from other people, and this doesn’t stop after a breakup. In fact, they may become more desperate for validation from others to fill the void left by the relationship.
Moving On
In some cases, a narcissist may move on to a new relationship quickly. This is often a rebound relationship, designed to fill the void left by the previous relationship. However, it’s important to note that the issues that caused the initial breakup will likely resurface in the new relationship.
The Aftermath
Regardless of the reaction, it’s important to remember that a breakup with a narcissist can be emotionally and mentally draining. It’s important to take time for yourself and seek support from loved ones during this difficult time.
Cutting Ties
After a breakup with a narcissist, it’s important to cut ties completely. This can be difficult, but it’s necessary to move on and heal. A narcissist may continue to try to manipulate or control you, so it’s important to set boundaries and stick to them.
Seeking Professional Help
It’s not uncommon for individuals who have been in relationships with narcissists to experience symptoms of PTSD or trauma. It may be beneficial to seek professional help to process the emotions and trauma associated with the breakup.
Moving On and Finding Closure
Ultimately, moving on from a relationship with a narcissist is about finding closure and healing. It may take time, but it’s important to focus on yourself and your own growth.
Conclusion
In conclusion, a breakup with a narcissist can be emotionally and mentally draining. Narcissists often struggle to handle rejection or failure, which can lead to destructive thoughts and behaviors. It’s important to remember that a breakup with a narcissist may require more time and effort to heal from, and it’s important to seek support and professional help if needed.
FAQs
- Do narcissists feel pain? Yes, narcissists can feel emotional pain, but they often try to hide it or deflect it onto others.
- How do narcissists react to rejection? Narcissists often react with rage or denial when faced with rejection.
- Do narcissists move on quickly? It’s not uncommon for narcissists to move on to new relationships quickly, but these relationships are often rebound relationships designed to fill the void left by the previous relationship.
- Can a narcissist truly love? Narcissists can have the capacity to love, but their self-centered tendencies often get in the way of forming healthy relationships.
References
1. Riggio, R. E. (2018). Narcissism, self-esteem, and culture: Issues of validity, narcissistic grandiosity, and functioning. Frontiers in psychology, 9, 2018.
2. Campbell, W. K., & Foster, J. D. (2007). The narcissistic self: Background, an extended agency model, and ongoing controversies. Handbook of self and identity, 115-138.
3. Malkin, C. (2015). Rethinking narcissism: The secret to recognizing and coping with narcissists. Harper Collins.
4. Durvasula, R. (2017). Should I stay or should I go?: Surviving a relationship with a narcissist. Post Hill Press.