How do cheaters react when confronted: Surprising Reactions

Cheating is one of the most common issues in romantic relationships. One of the hardest things to do is to confront a cheater. It can be nerve wracking and emotionally draining. However, if you suspect your partner is cheating, it is important to address it. Confronting a cheater can reveal a lot about their character and how they perceive the relationship. In this article, we will discuss the various reactions of cheaters when confronted.

Why Do People Cheat?

Before we dive into the reactions of cheaters, it’s important to know why people cheat. There are a multitude of reasons why people cheat. Some of the most common reasons include lack of emotional connection in the relationship, lack of intimacy, boredom, seeking validation, and not feeling appreciated or loved.

Reactions of Cheaters When Confronted

Denial and Gaslighting

One of the most common reactions from a cheater when confronted is denial. They will flat out deny that they are cheating, and may even try to gaslight the accuser by making them feel like they are crazy or paranoid. Gaslighting is a common tactic of cheaters and is a form of emotional manipulation where the accuser is made to feel like they are the problem.


Cheaters may also try to blame-shift when confronted. They may accuse their partner of not giving them enough attention or affection, or of being too jealous and controlling. This is an attempt to deflect attention away from their cheating and place the blame on their partner.


Cheaters may also try to deflect attention away from their infidelity by changing the subject or bringing up past mistakes of their partner. This is another tactic of manipulation and is used to avoid taking responsibility for their actions.

Emotional Outburst

Some cheaters may have an emotional outburst when confronted. They may become angry, defensive, or even cry. This reaction is often an attempt to manipulate the situation and make the accuser feel guilty for bringing up the issue.

Confession and Remorse

Not all cheaters react with anger or denial when confronted. Some cheaters may confess to their infidelity and show genuine remorse for their actions. This is often a sign that they truly regret what they have done and want to work on repairing the relationship.

Seeking Forgiveness

Other cheaters may apologize and seek forgiveness when confronted. They may promise to never cheat again and work on rebuilding trust in the relationship. However, it is important to note that seeking forgiveness is not always a sign of genuine remorse and the cheater may continue their behavior.

Confronting a Cheater

Confronting a cheater can be intimidating, but it is important to do so if you suspect infidelity. It’s important to approach the situation calmly and without accusations. Stick to the facts, and be prepared for any reaction. It’s also important to take care of yourself emotionally and have a support system in place.

What Happens After Confrontation?

After confrontation, there are a few ways that the relationship can go. The cheater may end the relationship, or the couple may work on repairing the relationship. It’s important to note that repairing a relationship after infidelity is a long and difficult process that requires effort from both parties. It’s up to the individual to decide if they want to continue the relationship or not.


Confronting a cheater can be a difficult decision, but it can reveal a lot about the cheater’s character and their perception of the relationship. The reactions of cheaters when confronted vary, but it’s important to approach the situation calmly and stick to the facts. After confrontation, the future of the relationship is up to the individuals involved.

Common Questions About Confronting a Cheater

  • Q: Should I confront my partner if I suspect infidelity?
  • A: Yes, it’s important to address any concerns you have in the relationship. However, it’s important to approach the situation calmly and stick to the facts.
  • Q: What if my partner denies cheating when confronted?
  • A: It’s important to stick to the facts and not get into an argument. If the denial continues, it may be necessary to seek counseling or end the relationship.
  • Q: Can a relationship survive infidelity?
  • A: Yes, but it takes effort from both parties to repair the relationship. It’s important to seek counseling and take time to heal before attempting to rebuild trust.
  • Q: What if my partner confesses to cheating?
  • A: It’s important to take time to process the confession and decide if you want to continue the relationship. Seeking counseling can also be helpful in this situation.


  • Whisman, M. A., Gordon, K. C., & Chatav, Y. (2007). Predicting sexual infidelity in a population-based sample of married individuals. Journal of Family Psychology, 21(2), 320.
  • Mark, K. P., Janssen, E., & Milhausen, R. R. (2011). Infidelity in heterosexual couples: demographic, interpersonal, and personality-related predictors of extradyadic sex. Archives of sexual behavior, 40(5), 971-982.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *